Reliquary of Dreams
by Tatrin
Summary: Carla and Grisha having a conversation about Eren... In which this Jaeger family knows the truth about Grisha because the doctor is an honest man.


**Reliquary of Dreams**

**Tatrin**

Eren was one of those people who knew _exactly_ what they would be.

How a talk about saving money morphed into this debate Grisha couldn't pinpoint but he could tell that talk of taxes led to Carla mentioning what they were for and the Survey Corps came up and the moment she said that they were the only branch that ventures outside the Walls his son's eyes shone, and she _recognized _it.

And Carla was dead set against Eren's desire.

"Eren, I truly hate to say that you are young, but you are YOUNG! You do not realize that being a Scout is basically throwing away your life!" Carla screamed. They've been at this for the better part of an hour, and at this point she truly cannot care if her neighbors would overhear their argument. Granted, people of her neighborhood would rarely hold any embarrassment over being heard when they shout because shouting is just asking for witnesses when their houses were situated closely and even closer as the population grew and the Walls stayed the same.

Not that they would ever explode over the Walls from overpopulation. Too many people in one place invited sickness and little resources meant desperation for work and the most guaranteed jobs are often the most dangerous ones. The Survey Corps is literally the WORST choice anyone with a shred of self-preservation could make. She had hoped that her son would at least possess a decent relationship with reality.

"I do realize! I'm not throwing my life away! I'm actually going to do something with it!" Having inherited her lungs and plenty of experience in using them, Eren screamed back. "We're just waiting to die in the Walls! Titans don't even need to eat us! They just can't help but kill us because we literally blind them! One day they'll break the Walls and we won't be able to do anything if we're just sitting here!"

Carla was having flashbacks of Keith screaming at her face about almost the same thing. Sadly, calmly stating her opinion on the matter didn't work as successfully with Eren as it had with her friend. Most unfortunately, he also inherited her mountain-like way of never changing her mind regardless of the opinions her own parents would blow on her.

However, he also inherited Grisha's river-like way of taking into account of others' opinions and adapting them for his own. It's past dinner already and before they annoy their neighbors past tolerance she has to somehow find a way to influence Eren to decide on his own to go off the ridiculous road of the Scouts for the Outside. She could work if his end goal is to 'see the Outside' and not to 'enter the Scouts', but it's going to be a tough battle to make it not synonymous with 'exiting the Walls'.

Carla was taking a deep breath when her husband placed a warm hand on her shoulder, smiled to relax her, and turned to face his son. "I believe this talk is best done once you both cool off."

"We're not hotheads!" Carla and Eren pouted.

Grisha chuckled. "Eren, have you finished studying the material I gave you last week?"

Eren blanched. "Oh, come on, dad, isn't surface anatomy enough already? There's too much! I did my best for a seven-year-old!"

Grisha's eyebrow rose, and it didn't take much to be visible since his spectacles weren't terribly big. "I suppose I can't expect you to understand everything on anatomy. You are a seven-year-old."

Eren's eyes widened and he ran straight to his room, rudely leaving his finished plate on the table, while shouting, "Of course I can! No way am I giving up!" Eren's feet stomped uninterrupted as he skillfully avoided knocking over the many potted plants he placed around the kitchen by narrow margins, before he opened and closed his bedroom door loudly.

The two adults smirked at the each other. They figured out very quickly that telling Eren to do things would work 50/50 at best, but goading him always drove his pride.

Carla gazed over at Grisha. Having the tension on her shoulders drop a few moments ago she sagged onto her chair in the kitchen. It was quite literally her chair instead of just one of the three chairs on their dining table. When Eren was four he had found two of them had a bit of nail protruding and selfishly wrote his name on the one that doesn't. Between the two chairs, he picked the uglier one to earn Grisha's name, figuring it fits because her husband often took trips away from home so he wouldn't mind. All to proudly prove that he had learned how to write and spite them for forcing him to study.

Understanding that her energy was spent too fast, Grisha quickly gathered their plates and utensils and put them in the sink, before heading for his designated chair, careful not to lean too hard onto the protruding nail at the back edge of the slab. "You don't want Eren to go outside the Walls, I take it?"

Carla shook her head. "No. Not now, maybe not ever. The Titans... even with you guarding him, you wouldn't match their nearly infinite number."

"And like Eren said, hiding is pointless."

Carla nodded.

"Even behind the Walls," Grisha continued in a quiet tone, knowing Carla would shoot a glare at him. She did. "By this logic, the Scouts would actually be the best choice. They are the most prepared ones when Titans finally breach the Walls."

Because somehow, someway, they will. The closer he is to the end of his time, the more visions from the future vessel of his Attack Titan appear. The one he had two nights ago was of Trost, recognisable from one of its landmarks, filled to the brim with _hordes_ and _hordes_ of people sleeping and spilling onto the streets. Refugees who could be none other than from Maria lands.

Carla frowned, correctly guessing what he was thinking of. "I can't put faith that Eren would somehow escape the 30% casualty rate of the Scouts. That's not even a yearly percentage, but the average of their _every expedition_." Carla wrung her hands. "That's horrifying to think of. And even if he survives each of them, what kind of life would our son have? You've seen the faces of the Scouts returning through Shiganshina once. Constantly mourning for their fallen comrades. Hopeless on the lack of progress on expanding territory," she sighed, catching herself from mentioning Keith. "Angry."

"He's plenty angry already," Grisha noted. Very unlike Zeke, his first son. Then again, back then Grisha was angry enough for two, certainly the angriest of their lot. He really doesn't have any right to imply Carla and Eren as hotheads so often. "But he finds hope in the Scouts."

"Ugh, I can already imagine school. Sheska would ask what they want to be when they grow up and my son would say he wants to join the Survey Corps. And they'd accept it! Maybe even direct him there. The Scouts need every person they can get since they can't stop their high death tolls!"

Or maybe Eren might say that he wants to explore the Outside, which would be _worse_. Adventures into the unknown is _not_ a value people inside the Walls appreciate. The mere desire to leave is seen as a heretic trait. Which is also another reason as to why the Scouts are so disliked.

Carla moaned. "The Titans pounding the other side of our wall aren't helping either. Maybe Eren would think differently if he lived without constantly hearing them every time he goes to the forest," a wide forest at the edge beyond the farms, home to all sorts of plants her son loves to pick for his experiments. "Like Sina."

Sina, where honesty and humbleness are shown with sarcasm, good deeds are questioned and bad deeds regularly ignored. A place where power and money have become prime needs for survival.

She paused. "Maybe not Sina. I don't want him getting influenced by the corruption over there."

Grisha only gave a shrug, staring absently at the few potted rubber figs they stationed in the corners for because they're powerful air cleaner and critical hitter for mold spores. "Any place would have corruption, I should think. Even here. Didn't Eren mentioned Hannes even offered him a drink?"

Carla grimaced. "Alright, Eren's smart enough to not be fooled. Maybe Sina wouldn't be so bad. It's definitely a lot safer than here, at the edge where _those people _let loose Titans." She groaned knowing this neat little trivia Grisha confided to them. "I'm going to have nightmares of Eren being anywhere near Titans."

She got up from her chair and picked up another glass, and went to the other table they have in the kitchen, closer to their window. It was a combination of a tall cupboard and table that Grisha and Carla had built themselves years ago. Each shelves separated by slabs of wood to store mostly plants with gastronomic profiles. The ones with medicinal properties needed extra spaces, so they had moved it to the window sills of the living room and their bedrooms.

She set the glass down and took a few seconds to decide on lemon balm instead of rose tea. It was still too early to sleep and lemon balm tea wouldn't make her drowsy, even though she liked rose tea better.

A few minutes flew by when she realized Grisha was still sitting quietly at the table. "What's on your mind, dear?"

"I have to pass on my Titan someday."

Maybe she should have chosen rose tea and excused herself to sleep early.

Carla quietly finished preparing her tea then sat back on her chair. Sadness crept her heart, thinking about her husband's shortening lifespan.

"I can't trust anyone to pass it onto but our son."

Carla stayed quiet, stirring her tea. She feels quite proud of herself that she didn't immediately throw the glass or the spoon or _both_ onto his face.

"How long have you been thinking of passing your Titan to Eren?" She managed to ask.

"Just now," Grisha admitted honestly. Carla mentioning her fear of Eren encountering Titans made him think of his own. He wondered who he would pass it onto, and the first person he thought of was his son. "I'm sorry."

"You'll doom him to live a short life," Carla said quietly. "I want our son to live safely. Grow old with a family of his own. I plea you not to give him the same fate as your first son."

"...I'm sorry." For even suggesting it. For even thinking of making his son hold the burden of the Attack Titan. For still thinking that he would do it if it means giving him the best chance he can have to survive. "The visions I'm getting doesn't paint the most optimistic picture of our fate in these Walls. Wall Maria... It will fall. I," Grisha faltered, seeing his wife trembling. He reached out to hold her free hand and squeezed. "I won't coddle you with lies, Carla."

For a moment, Carla held her a sweet smile. "Eren... could still be safe in the interior. He's bright. He could find a way to move permanently to Sina. There would still be Wall Rose. Maria lands are so vast Titans might not even reach Wall Rose before we drive them out. The military, oh Maria, the Scouts, they'd be on the frontlines. I don't want Eren to be put in that position!"

She was quickly working herself sick, barely thinking what she was saying. Times like this made her feel a bit of resentment for her husband. She'd certainly be happier and more carefree if he hadn't told her the truth of how cruel their fates may be. She wouldn't catch herself between moments remembering he would _leave_ her first in this life. She wouldn't feel the temptation to tell her best friends and neighbors and strangers and their kids and grandkids that their lives were at risk in a few years. She wouldn't think about how running to Sina is like hiding inside a poorly hidden crate from angry thugs, or deflate the moment she thought of taking a chance to the Outside because if not the Titans the entire world would see them dead because they were 'devils'.

But she wanted to marry an honest man, and this one happened to have the worst secrets to share.

"Eren just wants to know more about the Outside, he doesn't have to go out there." She wasn't sure who she was fooling. Eren quite obviously wanted to be out of the Walls. "You could share more stories about it. How dangerous it is. Demystify the Scouts. Do that. It may or may not change his mind, but it'd make him think twice about this foolish notion of doing something with his life by throwing it head first to Titans. Of leaving us behind. Of never finding a girl or a boy he can settle with safely because anyone in the Scouts would be liable to die any day."

He patted her shoulder, signaling for her to keep calm. A bit patronizing, she would have found but his chuckles were genuine. "If our son could have friends. He's 7 and he still hasn't introduced us to any friend." Grisha was often away, but he used to walk with Eren to the forest when his son was younger to teach him on how to identify useful and edible herbs. His son seemed to have taken botany better than anatomy, but Grisha suspected it was due to him being able to practice and freely explore the former and little in the way of the latter. They'd pass by people on their way, and Eren seemed to either be bored or offended after interacting with other people.

Carla pulled a face at that. "Sheska tells me about how he keeps driving other kids in his class off because he doesn't like their attitude. Like he doesn't have one!"

"Maybe he'll find one soon around here."

"Or in the interior," Carla swiveled in sudden excitement at the idea. "You could bring him to some of your trips to the interior when you visit your patients. Some of them must have kids. If Eren becomes friends with them, he might not be as quick to leave for military. Who knows, maybe he'll get a crush with a cute girl or boy there!" Carla squealed. "I'm still waiting for him to have one. I want to embarrass him so badly!" She gasped and covered her mouth with her hands, eyes darted to the direction of Eren's room hoping he hadn't heard her and inadvertently ruined her not to secret desire.

Even with years under his belt, Grisha was still quite helpless with Carla's rapid mood swings. "Perhaps. I'll have to think of a good excuse to explain why I'm bringing a child." Travel between Walls was under strict surveillance by the Military Police. Strictly speaking, _everyone _wanted to be in the Interior. Better protection, better food, better overall condition. If the MP doesn't consistently filter people, they'd run the risk of overpopulating the interior and ruining control. They'd learnt their lesson when decades back, parents from outer walls would bring their kids to the interior and leave them there so they'd have better chance of living a nice life. It messed up civilian counts and they ended up with an immense amount of people without legal protection. Now, one needed good reasons to cross Walls, especially for someone like Grisha who traveled to many places around the interior, which he could afford as his profession was in high demand and by the same vein he was sponsored by multiple nobles who were also some of his patients. What kind of reason they'd accept for Eren to tag along?

"You should make him your apprentice soon."

Grisha's eyes widened. "We're not going to wait for him to finish his schooling?"

"Dear, you're more than qualified to teach our son and we mostly sent Eren to school so he can make friends, which he's failing at because he doesn't like any kids here. At most, he fights them." Or he throws a soggy shoe at them.

"Maybe he does have one?"

Carla nodded, "We should talk to Eren about this first."

Inside Eren's room, potted plants and garden boxes boasting medicinal properties decorated half of the space, a wide wooden furniture divided to function as both a wardrobe and a bookcase decorate the other half, and a modest-sized bed decorated the middle of the room. There was no 7-year-old boy anywhere inside the room. The window was open.

Carla's eye twitched. "Eren."

* * *

**Recommended Stories**

**_Morally Unethical_ **by **AristoMuse** which depicts Doctor Eren Jaeger. Not a modern AU, but the author is taking us on a different side of AOT storyline from pre-season 1 where we get to see the smarter side of Eren that's always been overshadowed by his anger. If you love reading (and re-reading) it as much as I do, you might as well go to the author's twitter.

With that delicious mess of fic that puts on you on the edge, here's two lighthearted funny ones from **Chesra** called _**from friends to this (you're the one i want)** _and **ria_green** called _**domestic bliss (has never quite felt like this)**_. They're _Hoshiai no Sora_ fics, which is a very open-minded anime with unusually fresh storyline pacing that is highly highly _highly _CRIMINALLY UNDERWATCHED but not quite criminally underwrite. Not if we have a say in it!

Okay, so here's the most EPIC one. It's so epic, I consider it the pinnacle of EPICNESS because of its sheer BAMF level that never even touched the cringy threshold and that's saying something. A _My Hero Academic _fic by **AMournfulHowlInTheNight** titled _**Conversations with a Cryptid**_. The moment Izuku asked "No one's bothered to ask him anything about… anything? He must be around two-hundred years old and people can't think of a single non-current affairs thing to ask him?" I was glued onto the screen and ya'all should be hyped when Izuku's answer to All Might's insistence of All-For-One's evilness is "He's ancient. You honestly don't wonder about the sort of things someone with that life experience and Quirk would have run across to end up the way he did?"


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